In Pursuit of Mindfulness!

Hi there,

I want to share a thought that my Mindfulness pursuit has given me insights on. 

If you have ever seen someone you know, display some type of behavior, that you did not expect or even considered as unnecessary or toxic (as I have heard people describe), and you decided to ignore or withdraw at that point, I sincerely wish you hadn't!

Truly people can be toxic or even downright Unlikeable. I know this from exploring so many parts of myself (like I said, Mindfulness 🙃) and getting to really know who ESTHER is.

Regardless, if everyone on earth acted like that in such moments, I would not have grown as much as I have and be able to communicate properly with the world. 

That growth really kicked off when some of these people helped me switch the focus from my inadequacies and flaws; They didn't even use that as the yardstick for relating with me. The good qualities were magnified consistently and they decided to take a risk at helping me become my best version and I'm so grateful for the chance I got, without which I wouldn't be where I am presently.

You can say I am a product of climbing shoulders.

Take for example, I used to be a frowner (if that's even a thing). I frowned so much, people had their opinions about me without even getting as much as a hi from me.

Being a frowner meant that I hardly smiled, I was always frowning. I even had a friend that saw me laughing one day and was so disappointed that he didn't get a picture.

The scene was hilarious then, still rib cracking now and yes, I had friends then.

I had a senior brother friend, who was also my lecturer at the time (don't even bother trying to understand that qualification 🙃), that used to comment on the FACT that I didn't have a straight-face look, but I always looked like I was going to fight someone somewhere; you can imagine killer looks.

All in all, that trait didn't make all these people I now consider as friends, to step back from me. If anything, people can now approach me and be sure to get a decent first impression because some people were there to help me realise that there's more to me than my countenance. 

I remember one time I went to see my mentor and on getting there, he asked me to go and come back in 5 minutes because I was seriously frowning that day. I came back with a really fake smile but according to him, that was a much better look.

I had started living mindfully from the year 2017 and so many times I have flashbacks owing to different memory triggers. I'm referring to stuff I forced myself not to remember, because of the hurt associated with many of the memories.

You can imagine my surprise when I came to a realisation about where this habit started from.

I was on my way to work and when I realised, I had to even smile. I was frowning at that moment, (I stopped frowning as a habit, so now it happens when I'm deep in thought, and don't even bother asking why I still do, let's ask God together, shall we?) What happened was, I saw my reflection on a mirror close-by, I realised I had seen that exact face, the shape of the mouth, the deep worry lines, somewhere before and then I remembered 

👉🏽 Mum's face. 

Eureka

That's where I had picked up that habit, all my life, before going out into the world and expressing myself the only way I had known. Maybe she frowned from stress or even a habit she also picked up, I can't tell. But I had learned it and even now, I'm still unlearning it.

Well, I have become such a smiler... 😊☺️😊, these words I keep inventing ehnn... Maybe I should try my hands on writing a dictionary.

I know I'm laughing in this picture

I guess, all I'm saying is that before you decide to abandon the next person you have decided to play judge and jury over, give the person a chance.

You would be putting another ESTHER on the right path and helping her discover there's more to her, beyond her aesthetics.

Did you enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it?

Let me know!🖐🏼

#TalesOfAyo 

Funmi David.